Monday, August 15, 2011
When my vortexhealing® teacher started explaining that what I thought was a healing training was actually an awakening lineage, I must confess that I wasn't exactly excited.
In my experience the subject "awakening" was just a lot of talk about nothing.
However, I started to explore anew, very skeptical, but still.
I even managed to read stuff from Eckhart Tolle and watched the videos with Oprah.
Now, a year and a lot of reading and listening later, I must say that Tolle seems to be a manual on how to still improve the story ... very useful if that's what you're looking for, but has nothing to do with awakening i.m.h.o.
I had already studied Byron Katie earlier, and although I get the impression that she is actually "real", the work never did it for me. It was just another mental exercise. A friend of mine explained that Byron Katie had discovered "the work" AFTER she got enlightened, and it seems like that is a crucial note. Something energetic needs to happen with the work and when it does, it is wonderful. I loved her book "A thousand names for joy".
I also attended meetings with Adyashanti a couple of times as well as listened to his talks online.
My vortex teachers speak very highly of him and I made a real effort to get what he was saying.
However, it just went one ear in, the other out ... Sometimes it seems like he says something interesting, but the next moment I have forgotten it again already ...
I think I finally know why this is: there is somebody who thinks to have to teach a state of being to other somebodies ... in other words: there is something to get for the "me" or as some people refer to as ego (don't like the word). And thus the teaching reinforces the ego actually!
I did not come up with this insight myself: I went to Tony Parsons in Amsterdam this past weekend, which was just awesome! It was like coming home, so confrontational, so inspiring, so joyful and absolutely hopeless all at the same time! Revolutionary ... And so absolutely funny, I haven't been laughing as much in ages ... Finally the real deal.
No, I am not "awake" ... and the awful news is that I cannot do anything about it ... :-)